i'm really lucky.
really REALLY lucky.
for a time, it was super rough. i had willingly submitted myself to this symbiotic life with erin, rachel, caity, and everyone else i had come to fully depend upon for love, laughs, and commiseration... and then, it was gone. everyone moved, things changed, and everyone went out to live in new places and have new adventures after college. i was completely miserable. i'll say it. it was terrible. i was absolutely sure it was the end of the world. we're all still friends, and close. but it's so hard being split up, like you have to shred up your heart, pass it around, and hope it comes back again. it always does, of course... but it just required a little extra effort and more vacations, i've found. :)
and now, everything flipped around again, and i wasn't so alone in the place where i lived.
the next little world we all built seems to be doing the same things all over again.
caroline, clayton, sasha, alycin, kristen, sherer, hazel.... everyone is moving to different things and new chapters in their lives. and it's so exciting and so wonderful!! i have just been struggling within myself so much to be supportive when all i really feel like doing some days to do is just cling to their legs like a scared kindergartner on my first day of school, like anchoring their legs is going to make them stay here.
looking forward to the next little world and the next chapter that erik and i start in august, as i have not forgotten that i have the best man in the whole world right next to me for everything.
there's a book i always take with me when i travel. because you never know what line in that book is going to jump out at you on the page and help you along... i find new ones every time i read it. and there's a line that never fails to help me recognize the real significance and meaning of endings and goodbyes.
"What is that feeling when you're driving away from people and they recede upon the plain till you see their specks dispersing?--it's the too-huge world vaulting us, and it's good-by. But we lean forward to the next crazy venture beneath the skies."
a little kerouac always seems to do the trick.
looking forward to everyone's new ventures.
